SWAN LAKE

Nothing ridiculously fake.

2010-09-04T13:47:00.000-07:00

One year since I came here the last time..and I seriously laugh at the address name the moment I saw it.
No I didnt mean its childish but..uhuh.

Things really changed.
I might be more determined now. but not more motivated.
The road might be clearer now. but not easier.
I have to go through all this. I kept murmuring to myself. you'll do it one way or another. Maybe in the end I'll just laugh at all this. just maybe.

If you only knew what I'm experiencing. If I only knew what you're experiencing. But that would have been too good then. too good that it would become a dream. I know that.
I know that and know how to deal with it. But I'm tired babe.
So tired that I cant even think of you. I start to forget how ppl look like. how you speak. how my life went before JC.
ridiculous but true.

Its raining now.
It was violent just then but much more peaceful now. I'd never heard a rain that hit as hard as this before I came to Singapore. so hard as if hitting someone in revenge.
Everything would have become white if its daytime. only the raindrops. nothing else you can see. nothing else in the world. It's grandiose. as if in a maze.
Now it only sounds desolated. sure. no one else's awake now.
And I'm going. to become more normal. to start rushing. so that I can get closer to my dream. well. a dream I havent really define yet. but so what. get to somewhere first. otherwise you'll just get to nowhere.
That's for sure.

Good night babe.

SoFarAway.

2009-07-17T19:06:00.000-07:00

Only last night did i realise how long have i not logged into this blog..and it's nothing ridiculous as i've sign up for so many websites and blogs thus i might have just forgotten any one of them for months and never realise it.
The only ridiculous thing is about myself. What the heck is it that i don't even understand what i myself is thinking..?
Yup, well, i haven't got a crush on him..and that's for sure.
but then y do i care about anything about him..?
He's just a friend and not a friend as close as Loli or Easley..someone who can have no contact with you for weeks and you won't even miss him.
Everyone seems so faraway from me..maybe that's just because i unconsciously pull myself away from others too much. I'm gradually becoming a person who can sit in the classroom and never say a word for the whole day.
Well. okay. that's just like what it used to be so never mind.

Obsessed by Tizzy Bac and Olivia Lufkin recently..going to sing Olivia's song Wish on the concert in our hostel. May i be lucky enough to sing it well. (it may be the opening song as i'm the first one to sign it lol- -)

coming soon...

2009-01-08T03:18:00.001-08:00

题目出自小四..版权仍归小四所有吧...

i shall be updating in days but now i gt to read ss!...

Hate Without Frontiers-Sweetbox

2008-09-13T21:52:00.000-07:00

My aching world is fading pulses heartbeats oxidised
My one temptation last sensation is only suicide
My hunger screams, my blister bleeds and even though I try
To try to find the places where the pieces of my heart collide
Where I am flying totally weightless in a desert sky
Exploring, soaring in the deepest corner of my mind
And like a phoenix out of fire I'll be reborn to try
Ashes to dust, and dust to life

Hate without frontiers
...

我既非一无所有而来.也不会一无所有而去. I'll be reborn to try.

I Ask All Siants

2008-09-12T20:44:00.000-07:00

I can feel u here with me..i can feel ur heart

bt y i cnt feel my heart?

do i luv u? or did i ever?

i guess i'll be escaping as i can c d distance betwn us...maybe tht's smthing tht cnt be changed..bt u cnt c it. u r nt here when i nid u n tht's it. tht's wad i only nid...u said u no i nid understanding. bt u dun even understand me. u dunno tht i nid smone to be here with me so i can cry..i've been pretending to be cool for too long..bt u cnt c. u nvr c...maybe i shouldn compare u with Easley. i shouldn compare anyone with him. tht's wrong...bt he's becoming a standard...maybe i juz should be with him..if i gt refuse him. den i should refuse anyone else on d earth...

oh baby i dunno wad im missing...

maybe i'll nvr be able to explain to u how important is a lantern to me. n u may nvr understand everything i had to explain..im tired darling..maybe i'll nvr be able to sae gdbye. bt u'll nvr be able to touch my heart even if u r holding my hand...

i dun luv u baby..bt maybe i'll nvr sae..i've hurted enough hearts n even though i do nothing there'll still be broken heart...

d only thing i leave to u is d 'nice dream'..i'll leave it only to u 4 all tis years when v r tgthr..

我曾经说过.在七夕与光棍节之间开始恋爱的人最可怜.因为他们两个节日都过不成.

nw i find tis mocking..i should laugh at myself 4 being such a great seer

i c ppl all puting things thy want&wish on thir blog..

bt wad i really wan&wish?

I WISH THT I'VE NVR WANTED ANYTHING BEFORE..

My Life. ..

2008-07-21T05:40:00.000-07:00

Im getin busy t forget him. ..

YES. ..thts th correct attitude thts th rite way. ..

n so tht i wun miss him. ..

HAH..juniors are having thr math&English tests tdae n tht reminds me wad things was like a year before when we were having the tests. ..

n many memories. ..

NE Show Chpt2 Black Knights

2008-07-18T22:05:00.000-07:00

yah..thiz actually's a jet show>>>>>>>

smthin tht any country will show on thir national day. ..

NE Show Chpt1 NAN HUA DANCE

2008-07-18T04:06:00.000-07:00

YES.NAN HUA DANCE IN NE SHOW >>>>>>>

(i juz c th prepairing show on 12 July n tuk th photos wiz my hp. ..)

上海台北.单程飞机.

2008-07-17T04:40:00.000-07:00

读<双城故事>已经是上个星期的事情了..
也许.对于上海.还是不能释怀.. .
wad a hell is there. ..in Shanghai..attractin so many ppl.. .t go there. ..throw away anythin else they hav. ..seeking their own doom like a moth. ..
n Y do u go there..Easley.. .like a soldier flee in disorder from th front line
R u escaping me or urself. ..
one dae.maybe.. .i shall go there..too
t c y ppl all take there as a sheltr
as they can escape nothin bt themselves. ..

some extracts from the buk. ..
1.我本以为可以用一种美丽的姿态飞翔而去,没想到却是狼狈地逃离...

2."问我来上海的原因啊,我可以说不知道嘛...?"

3.曾经有一个人,留了一个位子给某一个人,她却来来去去,始终不愿坐下,直到有一天,这个人决定把位子留给其他人,但是却发现这个位子已经剩下不到一半的空间.现在的他,花了很多力气好不容易把这个位子腾空,给了别人坐下,但是,却赫然发现,座位旁边的脚印却无法除去.

4.其实,你没看过原稿,远比这精彩,也比这心痛.

5.也许爱着我对他来说,就像生了一场病,离开以后,他并不是不爱了,只是症状变得轻微了.

6.我最难过的就是不直到自己为什么爱,为什么苦.

7.因为贪恋着他的专宠,所以情愿不快乐,情愿被禁锢.

8.我问自己,我要什么,我什么都不要,我想要给他没有阻碍的爱,没有负担的爱.他可以爱我,可以宠我,但不必负担我,不必给我什么.

9. 生命太快,选择太多.

10.爱不是目的,快乐才是,我爱你不是去要求你也爱我,给我快乐,而是希望你因为有我的爱而幸福快乐.

11.因为你我都经历过几次感情的波折,像被裁切过数刀的不规则纸板,凑在一起是那么恰好地贴合,却仍能保有各自的棱角.

12.如果你觉得冷,可以告诉我,我会假装不怕冷,把外套借给你.

13.我的伤口血流如注,一直无法愈合;他的伤口已经不流血了,却非常深...

14.时间打了一个结,把我们折进去,恰恰一个漂亮的弯度,足以照映月光和星光,反射刀身体的深处,不亮也不暗,刚好可以入眠...

how do u spell FINALLY

2008-07-15T01:58:00.000-07:00

finally can open pages. ...NUS has th worst network ive ever experienced..had t kip everythin in one dae' page

.
.

不是无缘

而是有缘无分. ..

你也不是正确的人罢. ..

在错误的时间与地点遇见了正确的人. ..也许

一个人逃避叫做逃避

两个人逃避呢. ..遗憾或是无缘

这世间令人感动的事

并不只爱情一件啊. ..

所以.也许应该选择不爱. ..

或者爱

只是不再那么重要

那么撕心裂肺

那么心痛. ..

向卢沟桥烈士及五十七中罹难的老师们致哀. ..

活着的人们都会好好地活着. ..

请安息. ..

----from 13 July

I hate th network in NUS Hostel

I hate u

I hate myself

BUT I LOVE THE REST PARTS OF THE WORLD. ..

白染说得没错

有时候我也很希望你死. ..

苏白染.SWB.苏格桑.爱喜.

生日快乐.HAPPY BIRTHDAE. ..

----from 14 July

七夕又快到了罢. ..

这一次要怎样面对呢. ..

逃避或者面对.这种问题大概也没有答案. ..

pls sae

2008-07-09T06:30:00.000-07:00

So nice t teachers from Zhengzhou. ..
呜..老乡见老乡.两眼泪汪汪啊. ..
first time fr me t b so talktive. .
ANYWAY. ..AT LEAST TWO of th teachers SAID that I AM VERY LOVELY. ..- -
HAH. ..

Tdae watch BUCKET LIST. ..
SAE WAD U NID T SAE

二度blurryiNG....

2008-07-06T19:38:00.000-07:00

你是我凝望的侧脸. ..
我是你冻结的石像. ..
- -来自7月4日

卢沟桥事件71周年. ..post纪念
以示哀悼. ..
这世界就是个混沌的圈子.无数命定的线结成的大网兜. ..那么.已发生的与尚未发生的.既然早已定好.我们便都是局外人. ..
愿亡灵安息. ..

blurryiNG....

2008-07-01T06:07:00.000-07:00

冷风过境.
冷风过境..
冷风过境...
冷风过境....
冷风过境.....
冷风过境......
冷风过境.......

HAH. .. . .
switching classroom. ... .my fulfilled locker. ...
cnt lift my arm any more. .. .. .
sacrificing my strength to clump into that damn classroom(former 304). ...

Im NGing. ..
nvm. ...

Seems to be long ago. .. .

2008-06-30T06:33:00.000-07:00

wad shud I say. ...go n die. ..u.. ...
okay. ...dun like u any more. .. ...

wrting lyrics. ...bt cnt find one t produce tune 4 me. .. .. .
whn can find smone t .. .. . . like LEN n NANA

其实也没什么. . .. .. .

也许我太粗心大意
掉进命运做的陷阱
相遇也许真的是地心引力
所以才难以抗拒

等待像我一贯的站姿
却发现只是为了遇见你
只想再次相遇
不去想在劫难逃的宿命

原罪有一种就叫爱情
犯罪时不经意
赎罪用一辈子
但为什么无法后悔遇见你

其实也没什么我没问题
转过身就当作没遇见你
做梦时就反抗地心引力
也可假装对你毫不在意

其实也没什么我没问题
掩饰心痛只要表情平静
低下头就会只看到空气
所以你怎样我也没关系

冷风过境
爱情不见踪影
只找到我的心痛
骗自己说一切不会是梦
所以被惩罚被动

He's unbelievable

2008-06-23T06:13:00.000-07:00

what a suprising discovery I got tday...really unbelievable..
- -
must check it..
to be continued..

PS for th song..<>

chorus 1
so tonight i'm gonna get him
got a rendezvous at seven
faire l'amour toujours so funny
wanna spend all of this money
should i wear a dress and high heels
should i go out in my blue jeans
he's the boy i met in my dreams
and i tell you girls
he's unbelievable

verse 1
sisters, only sometimes
you can meet the kind of boy
who will always give you joy
then grab him, never let him
take him deep into your world
be aware of their girls
he's so unbelievable
finally it is me, see me happy
today i have found him
he's the boy of my dreams
and he's unbelievable

verse 2
brothers, only mothers
have the right to decide
what is wrong or what is right
but you maybe find a baby
who is no the kind of girl
to fit in your mother's world
he's so unbelievable
ain't a doubt shout it out that you love her
only such a tough guy
could become my only one
cause he's unbelievable

chorus
c-part
sharp dressed you may face your rendezvous
depressed if he's not good looking too
maybe he's a lazy kind of lad
don't forget he could turn into a prince in bed
be sure that he's standing by your side
cowards are a waste of time
get it on if he's always on your mind
but avoid being love-blind
look out for his sensitivity
check out if he knows just what it means
to give everything that a lady needs
to prove that his love is pretty real
some guys only show their sex appeal
and who knows why the lord had made 'em
if you think he's the right guy fall in love
if he's not keepin' your hands off

chorus 2
supernatural things will happen
i can call you at eleven
i will tell you every detail
if he's worth it or if he failed
but i know he drives me crazy
and i want to have his baby
so you must excuse me, ladies
did i tell you that
he's unbelievable

Anyway..I should say that..
he's really unbelievable...

Ordinary.for whom...

2008-06-21T23:59:00.001-07:00

disappointed finding him actually ordinary?...
Hey. do u know. Easley.. everyone seems ordinary compared t u..
then.. how can I find someone t...
haiz...

then what would u say when u c this...
in spite of anything may disappoint me..I still have a feeling of ph<7
when thinkin of him...

dun worry..
it`s juz..
a little pain...